In the last post, we talked about how distorted filters corrupt our conversations. Our ultimate goal is to approach interactions from a place of grace. Only grace that is given to us freely from Jesus will enable us to build up instead of tear down.
How can we gauge practically the quality of our conversations? How can we tell if the words we are saying are helping or hurting other people? The following is a good list of questions to ask yourself personally. It will enable us to understand if our words are really bringing life or death into our conversations.
1. Do the words you say bring about peace and calm or do they create chaos and disorder? (Js. 3:15-17).
2. Does your talk have a “stand together” or a “me againsthim/her/them” posture?
3. Do your words encourage others to be open and honest about their thoughts and feelings?
4. Are you approachable and teachable or defensive and self-protective when talking with others?
5. Is your communication healthy in the principal relationships in your life?
- extended family
- sibling relationships
- body of Christ
6. Does your talk encourage faith and personal spiritual growth in those around you?
7. Do you talk with others to develop relationships with them, or do you only talk to solve problems during
times of trouble?
8. Do you speak humble and honest words of confession when you sin and words of sincere forgiveness when
others sin against you?
9. Do your words reflect a willingness to serve others or a demand that they serve you?
10. As you face the struggles of talk, do you do so with a recognition of the gospel—God’s forgiveness, his enabling
grace, and the sanctifying work of the Holy Spirit?
The above list of questions comes from a phenomenal resource analyzing the importance of words and how we use them.
Click here to view the source.
Question: What else would you add to the above list to determine whether your words are helping or hurting other people? What specifically are you doing in your life to make sure you speak wholesome words into the lives of people that surround you?